Tracy Morgan ...Straight up Wacky

If any of you out there are too uptight and square or just flat out can't stand Saturday Night Live. Or stand up comedy at all for that matter. It's possible that you may not be aware of one Tracy Jamal Morgan, I guess. He was on SNL  for years and is a pretty prominent character on the hit show 30 Rock. Hell he even did some decent stand up from time to time back in the day. But for the most part Tracy Morgan is best known for saying completely off the wall shit at the most unusual times and looking like this .

go get em T.

At any rate I've always found the man's sheer ridiculousness to be absolutely hysterical. So of course as the high quality journalist and gold chain model that I am, I decided to call in some favors and get myself an interview. 

Sadly it turns out that all my best connections combined were only big time enough to get me a 10 minute google chat with Tracy. Not even a Skype session, damn. After voicing my displeasure with this Tracy's people assured me (between chuckles) that I would indeed get ten minutes time with the real Tracy Morgan. There was only one catch they said. Tracy had decided that he would only speak to me by way of re tweeting his own tweets. 

I was disappointed at first but then I thought , ok screw it , if that's how they want to be. Tracy Morgan's old shit is still better than most celebrities live shit so to hell with it, I agreed to the chat.

So without further delays I welcome you all to sit back and enjoy my interview with Tracy Morgan. Or his  Twitter feed, or whatevs.

   

Pedro Gorinni                                             VS

Tracy Morgan

PEDRO - "Ok I'm in the chat room now , Tracy can you see me ?"

TRACY - The wait is over! The black Svengali has arrived! I'm on the street turning good girls bad and getting them pregnant!!! 1:01 PM Oct 8th, 2009 via web

PEDRO - "YAAA that's what I'm talking about ! Tracy Morgan in the house everybody! Tracy we only have ten minutes here so I'll get right to it. How are things going on 30 Rock man , how's the career treatin ya?"

TRACY - 30 ROCK rocks- Stay tuned. You ain’t seen nothing yet. 1,255,718,032,000.00 via UberTwitter

PEDRO - "That it does sir , that it does. I'm a big fan of your comedy my man, got anything new on the horizon?"

TRACY - Check out my story I'm THE NEW BLACK, its out today! 1,256,044,115,000.00 via web

PEDRO - "Great! I'll check that out. What is it exactly? Some kind of tell all book?"

TRACY - Fuck that. Express yourself. 1,255,212,851,000.00 via web 

PEDRO - "Right, uhm , If someone like me wanted to read it where would I find it?"

TRACY - It don't matter who you be just be for real if you want to fuck with Tracy Morgan. Bout to do a show at Penn St. Check me out. 1,255,213,421,000.00 via web  

PEDRO - "I see, how's the family?"

TRACY - World Be Free. Oh Yeah, Evil Knievel's my biological father. 1,255,194,048,000.00 via UberTwitter 

PEDRO - "Boy Tracy , you sure have  a way with words. But speaking of fatherhood, you have three boys don't you?"

TRACY - Im a good parent so ill induce the labor 1,255,033,782,000.00 via web 

PEDRO - "Oooooooooooo K then. I'm terrified to ask how that might go so I'll just change the sub--"

TRACY - my dickhead is shaped liked a darth vadar helmet. my dick is so fat it looks like r2d2. 1,255,030,993,000.00 via web 

PEDRO - " Say what ? oh , well , never mind. What's a guy like you do in his spare time?"

TRACY - For $15 I'll induce your labor 1,256,133,201,000.00 via UberTwitter 

PEDRO - "Dear god. This seems like it might be getting away from me T."

TRACY - I'm doing stand up this Friday at Carnegie Hall. Come check me out...I'm going raw dog on this one. 1,257,295,807,000.00 via web 

PEDRO - "Your not quite all there are you big man?"

TRACY - Welcome To Tracy Morgans World... 10:31 AM Oct 8th, 2009 via web 

PEDRO - " Indeed , well I did ask for this interview. Let's try to get back on track here. I've heard you like to get down bro, what's a big weekend for you these days?"

TRACY - At Yankee Stadium chillin with Harry Bellafonte 1,256,424,746,000.00 via UberTwitter 

PEDRO - ................................

TRACY - Just got off the phone with puff daddy wishing him a happy birthday 1,257,361,787,000.00 via web  

PEDRO - "You know what , I think I've had enough bro , thanks for hanging wi--"

TRACY - having a cheeseburger delux and diet coke at 9am - breakfast of champions 1,256,133,060,000.00 via UberTwitter

PEDRO - "Whatever dude , I'm outta here."

TRACY - Come holler at me tomorrow night 7pm in harlem HUE MAN BOOK STORE. 1,256,050,270,000.00 via UberTwitter 

PEDRO - "Ya probably not , see ya"